I had breakfast with Maggie this morning, a glamorous meal of oatmeal and juice. Maggie was, as usual, naked except for Mia’s underwear, which were white with little mutli-colored hearts that puffed up over her hips like the a muffin top.
We were having a conversation where we remembered different things. In the background noise I could hear Mia talking with Isaiah wile she was going to the bathroom.
Maggie voice was soft, sweet, and very high pitched as she told me another memory:
“Mommy, I want to tell you something...I went potty once and I fell in and I called for you and you came and YOU LAUGHED!” By the end of this her voice had risen to a shriek and she had her arms in a shrug, classic “You Wanna Piece of ME?” stance.
I started laughing in memory of Maggie trapped with her behind in the toilet and her knees knocking against her ears, toes wiggling frantically, her arms sprawled across the toilet seats like the arm rests of a recliner.
Maggie started laughing with me and together we chuckled, her pearly white teeth in little corn rows across her mouth, eyes crinkled up and cheeks round and merry.
Oh, how I love this little girl!
It catches me off-guard sometimes, this wellspring of love that comes up in me. The absolute intensity of the emotion is startling, consuming, it brings tears to my eyes.
That laughter is so refreshing to my soul! The past few weeks have been pretty awful in many ways. The sheer amount of work that needed to be done to get our college’s New Student Orientation to come off well was overwhelming. In my “part-time” job I got at most 4 hours of sleep a night for a few weeks and what little sleep I got was punctuated by a nursing baby and a rotation of nocturnal visits from Mia and Maggie. Isaiah was starting soccer preseason during the same time, so both of us were very busy.
In the end it looks like Isaiah’s soccer team is the strongest in many years, we brought in the largest incoming class in the history of the school, and the retention, which my division is responsible for, was at 87%. That’s a school record and also pretty mind-blowing across the field for student retention. It was a very successful start to the year.
This week I’m finally starting to unstress. I love my job, no doubt, but I love my family more. My guts clench up when I spend too much time away from them, when I pass the caretaking responsibilities on to someone else, even Grandma and Grandpa. It feels like I blinked and Mikayla is ready to eat solid foods, rolling over and trying to sit up. I know from here we’re on a roller coaster of “firsts” and I don’t want to be so consumed by my stuff that I miss out on theirs.
It’s a balancing act. I do wonder if I’ll ever get it quite right?
Mia started preschool and had a run in with a little boy named Leland. On day one she came home reporting that he had hit her eight times but that he hit everyone else more because he wanted to marry her. Well, his infatuation didn’t last too long and when she told me that he punched her in the eye and neck I contacted her teacher and expressed our concern. She’s been moved away from sweet Leland and is downright chirpy when reporting about her day’s events.
Yesterday she told me:
“Mommy, I have a new friend, named Caidon. He likes me. Do you want to know how I know he likes me? He gave me a big smile, so’s I just knew and I smiled back.” She stopped, clasped her hands to her heart and said, “He said the sweetest thing to me – would you like to know what it is? He said he wished he could die in my heart!”
She was obviously quite impressed with his suicidal tendencies. I find it just bizarre but apparently he’s not hitting her, so who can complain.
BUT... Leland is hitting him. So I guess Caidon’s parents might want to be complaining.
And what, are they serving Viagra in the elementary school cafeteria? Why all this talk about love and marriage at four and five years old?!
When Mia reported to Isaiah about Caidon he grilled her:
“Is he smart?”
“Yes, Daddy!”
“Is he nice to you?”
“Yes.”
“Is he athletic?”
“ Yes... Um... I don’t know what that means but I’m sure he is.”
OK.
And, finally, the update for Mikayla is that the cafeteria served hot wings today for lunch and I couldn’t control myself. Even though I very clearly remember the misery that involved Buffalo Wild Wings the scent of that hot sauce won me over. I ate five wings... And...
... Mikayla has been ok with it!!! I think I can go on a date sometime soon to BWW’s again! I’m so stinkin’ excited I just can’t contain it. I may skip.
Or just go to sleep – it’s a toss up!
JJ
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