Potty Training

A friend of mine asked me for advice about potty training this week.  I'm not an expert, but I guess two kids potty trained makes me smarter than the average fifth-grader, so I replied.  As I was writing I thought that maybe I'd share my extensive wisdom with the rest of the people who call me friend and family.

With Mia I read articles on potty training and looked wistfully at the little potty chairs in Wal-Mart.  I was particularly intrigued by the one that sang a song once the tinkle had tunkled, but my budget brought me to a monetary compromise with a model that was mint green with a blue foam seat.

This worked very well, serving as both a potty and step stool in the corner of the bathroom.  

Then Mia used it once.  And I realized that the bowl has to be cleaned.  Emptied, cleaned, and then sanitized.

And I had pregnant-bloodhound nose.  And urine has never been my forte.  Poop even less so.

Mia began to use the big-girl potty with incentives of M&M's and Reese's pieces.  Mommy didn't have to do anything but remember to flush.  All was right in the world.

We talked to Mia about what was going on with her body and watched Elmo's Potty Time on DVD many, many times.  I can still sing the "It's Potty Time!" song and laugh when I see the little kid yell, "I call it DOODEE!"

I've been known to make my single, non-children-owning friends watch that DVD.  I should apologize to them.

With Maggie… Well, we followed an entirely different course of action with her.

We birthed Mia first.

Mia is extremely bossy.

We let Maggie run around nekkid* in the yard all summer long and when she went, I hosed her off.

Suddenly she was potty trained.  (I'm certain it had something to do with her big sister telling her non-stop that she needed to put her potty in a toilet.)

And that's how we do it.

All clear?

*Yes, I do know that it's supposed to be "naked."  But I really prefer the southern drawl in my mind when I write "nekkid," so that's how it is.  It's my story and I get to tell it however I choose.  ** We have a high privacy fence.  And little ones don't need to worry about tan lines.

The end.